The Boys Matrix

I think I miscalculated.

And so, being the Excel freak that I am, I prepared a spreadsheet. I used some assumptions based on how I remembered things and, voila, I came up with this table below.

Basically, the table presents the approximate number of partners I've had per year from 2000 to 2010.

Yes, there are 52 weeks in a year. I used 49. 3 weeks were deducted to make it more realistic. I am normally at home with the family - Christmas, New Year and Holy Week - which are, technically, sexless weeks. Technically.

The average boys per week are my best guesstimate as to my sexual prowess for that particular year. I peaked in 2001 to 2004 at 5 boys per week. Yes, sex every other day, on average. No, they don't have to be one after the other because sometimes, they were grouped together in several permutations. 2005 was my "serious relationship" year. I have included one indiscretion per month to account for human error. Same goes for 2007. If you noticed, in 2010, sex is just a weekly activity. See? I am changing. Haha.

Anyway, following these basic assumptions, the resulting figure is 1,352 boys over a ten year period. Using this figure, apparently, I hook up with, on average, 3 boys per week. Now, this seems closer to reality, right?

American Pie suggested that female figures need to be multiplied by three, i.e. if a woman tells you that she's slept with 10 guys, she's actually slept with 30. For men, the figure should be divided by three. If I were a woman, my number is 4,056. But, since, technically, I'm a guy, it should be 451.

I think I'd just divide it by two - 676 then.

Case closed.